Friday the 13th

Movie Info

Directed by: Marcus Nispel (The Texas Chainsaw Masacre (remake), Pathfinder)
Written by: Screenplay: Damian Shannon (Freddy vs Jason) & Mark Swift (Freddy vs Jason)
Starring: Some 20 hot somethings who play hot teenagers who end up dying hotly
Genre: Horror
MPAA Rating: R for strong bloody violence, some graphic sexual content, language and drug material
Runtime: 97 minutes

Reviews

RottenTomatoes Score: 25% Fresh
MetaCritic Score: 35/100
IMDB Rating: 7.0/10
My Response: At least it's rated R. A slasher pick that is only PG-13 is no slasher at all. I'm not a huge fan of remakes that are not necessary, so I just recommend renting the original and cozying up with someone hot if you want to watch a scary movie this Friday the 13th.

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Underworld: Rise of the Lycans

Movie Info

Directed by: Patrick Tatopoulos (Bird of Passage)
Written by: Nine dudes....too many to list
Starring: Rhona Mitra (Doomsday, Shooter), Michael Sheen (Underworld, Frost/Nixon), Bill Nighy (Underworld, Love Actually)
Genre: Action/Fantasy/Horror
MPAA Rating: R - for bloody violence and some sexuality
Runtime: 93 minutes

Reviews

RottenTomatoes Score: 38% Fresh
MetaCritic Score: 47/100
IMDB Rating: 6.8/10
My Response: There is only one word I can use to talk about this film: Why? As in... why make a prequel to a crappy movie franchise...why would Michael Sheen go from the Oscar-nominated Frost/Nixon to this....why does Bill Nighy, a respected English actor, do these horrible vampire movies...why are there NINE writers for this movie? Why? Why? Why? Skip it.

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My Bloody Valentine 3D

Movie Info

Directed by: Patrick Lussier (Dracula 2000, White Noise 2)
Written by: Screenplay: Todd Farmer (Jason X) & Zane Smith (film writing debut)
Starring: Jensen Ackles (Supernatural (TV), Smallville (TV)), Jamie King (Sin City, Pearl Harbor), Kerr Smith (Cruel Intentions 3, Justice (TV))
Genre: Horror
MPAA Rating: R - for graphic brutal horror violence and grisly images throughout, some strong sexuality, graphic nudity and language
Runtime: 101 minutes

Reviews

RottenTomatoes Score: 57% Fresh
MetaCritic Score: 54/100
IMDB Rating: 6.7/10
My Response: The trailer ends with "Nothing says 'Date Movie' more than a 3D ride to hell." I can't disagree or even come close to improving upon this line, but I can add some background info. This is based on a cult classic of the same name from the early 80's, and hopefully it's a good throwback to good ol' slasher films of young, hot, scantly clad humans getting slasherized. Rent it.

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The Unborn

Movie Info

Directed by: David S. Goyer (The Invisible, Blade: Trinity)
Written by: David S. Goyer (The Dark Knight, Jumper)
Starring: Odette Yustman (Cloverfield, October Road), Gary Oldman (The Dark Knight, The Fifth Element), Cam Gigandet (Twilight, The O.C)
Genre: Horror
MPAA Rating: PG-13 - for intense sequences of violence and terror, disturbing images, thematic material and language including some sexual references
Runtime: 87 minutes

Reviews

RottenTomatoes Score: 14% Fresh
MetaCritic Score: 33/100
IMDB Rating: N/A
My Response: I'm not surprised that all the promotional material for this one focuses on two things: David S. Goyer's ties to The Dark Knight (he helped write it) and Odette Yustman's greatest asset (and it ain't her acting skills). Althought Goyer helped pen TDK, don't give him too much credit, as he had the help of two great film writers in the Nolan brothers. And don't expect much from this one either, so skip it.

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Twilight

Movie Info

Directed by: Catherine Hardwicke (Thirteen, Lords of Dogtown)
Written by: Stephenie Meyer (novel), Melissa Rosenberg (screenplay)
Starring: Kristen Stewart (Jumper, Panic Room), Robert Pattinson (Harry Potter 4 & 5), Billy Burke (Ladder 49, 24)
Genre: Drama/Horror
MPAA Rating: PG-13 - for some violence and a scene of sensuality
Runtime: 122 minutes

Reviews

RottenTomatoes Score: 44% Fresh
MetaCritic Score: 56/100
IMDB Rating: 5.5/10
My Response: Seriously, what's with vampires these days? There are best selling vampire books, a hit TV show (True Blood on HBO), and movies?!? I honestly don't get it. But I know who does: people who want to sell stuff to teenage girls. Hey, let's be honest. Boy bands have been dead for a while now, so what's a teenage girl to spend her money on? Vampires! Yea! Twilight has been getting all kinds of attention and publicity for this reason, and it's not even going to be as good as The Lost Boys, let alone Interview with a Vampire. Skip it.

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Repo! The Genetic Opera

Movie Info

Directed by: Darren Lynn Bousman (Saw II, III, IV)
Written by: Darren Smith & Terrance Zdunich (play & screenplay)
Starring: Paul Sorvino (Romeo + Juliet, Goodfellas), Anthony Head (Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Dr. Who), Paris Hilton (House of Wax, The Simple Life)
Genre: Horror/Musical/Rock Opera
MPAA Rating: R - for strong bloody violence and gore, language, some drug and sexual content
Runtime: 98 minutes

Reviews

RottenTomatoes Score: 26% Fresh
MetaCritic Score: 31/100
IMDB Rating: 6.4/10
My Response: Repo! The Genetic Opera is the perfect example of a future cult film because it has everything nobody wants in a movie, and that's exactly why it might work. People either seem to love it or hate it. You'll either smile ear to ear with joy because of the originality or it all, or walk out halfway through and demand your money back because of the random smutness of it. It's your choice.

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Official Website

Splinter

Movie Info

Directed by: Toby Wilkins (Tales From the Grudge, Staring at the Sun)
Written by: Kai Barry, Ian Shorr, & Toby Wilkins (screenplay)
Starring: Shea Whigham (Man of the House, All the Real Girls), Jill Wagner (Shifter, Blade: The Series), Paulo Costanzo (Road Trip, Joey)
Genre: Horror
MPAA Rating: R - for violence/gore and language
Runtime: 82 minutes

Reviews

RottenTomatoes Score: 70% Fresh
MetaCritic Score: 74/100
IMDB Rating: 6.7/10
My Response: Splinter looks to be the must-see horror film this Halloween for true horror movie fans. It will be the horror flick talked about in comic book stores rather than around the water cooler, and that's obviously a good thing. It won several awards at Screamfest 2008, so watch out Academy Awards! I think I see some shades of the classic film The Thing in this movie, but don't take that quote too literally. The only bad thing about this film is that it is in limited release, but definitely check it out if you're up for a fright!

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Official Website

The Haunting of Molly Hartley

Movie Info

Directed by: Mickey Liddell (directorial debut)
Written by: John Travis & Rebecca Sonnenshine (screenplay)
Starring: Haley Bennett (Music & Lyrics, College), Chance Crawford (Gossip Girl, The Covenant)
Genre: Horror
MPAA Rating: PG-13 - for strong thematic material, violence and terror, brief strong language and some teen drinking
Runtime: # minutes

Reviews

RottenTomatoes Score: N/A
MetaCritic Score: N/A
IMDB Rating: N/A
My Response: The Haunting of Molly Hartley is this year's token Halloween teen slasher flick. None of the major critical outlets have reviewed it, and I'm going to have to agree with them on this one: No need to review it. No need to see it.

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Official Website

Saw V

Movie Info

Directed by: David Hackl (directorial debut)
Written by: Patrick Melton & Marcus Dunstan (screenplay)
Starring: Scott Patterson (Saw IV, Little Big League), Costas Mandylor (Saw III, Saw IV), Tobin Bell (Saw I, Saw II)
Genre: Horror
MPAA Rating: R - for sequences of grisly bloody violence and torture, language and brief nudity
Runtime: 88 minutes

Reviews

RottenTomatoes Score: 14% Fresh
MetaCritic Score: 19/100
IMDB Rating: 6.2/10
My Response: You may be wondering why there is another Saw movie. Here's why: they're super cheap to make (thanks to low production costs), and turn in decent box office numbers (thanks to legions of horror film fans looking anywhere for blood). Horror series like this usually guarantee two things: a horrible movie and a profit. Skip it and hope there isn't another one on the way.

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Quarantine

Movie Info

Directed by: John Erick Dowdle (The Poughkeepsie Tapes)
Written by: John Erick Dowdle & Drew Dowdle (screenplay)
Starring: Jennifer Carpenter (Battle in Seattle, White Chicks), Steve Harris (Minority Report, The Skulls), Jay Hernandez (Friday Nights Lights, Lakeview Terrace)
Genre: Horror
MPAA Rating: R - for bloody violent and disturbing content, terror and language
Runtime: 89 minutes

Reviews

RottenTomatoes Score: 67% Fresh
MetaCritic Score: 52/100
IMDB Rating: 5.7/10
My Response: This movie is a remake of a Spanish horror film that is somewhat respected. Quarantine uses the same hand-held camera technique that was so effective in Cloverfield and The Blair Witch Project, but we don't know how well it will work out here. Director Dowdle has already made some lower end horror films, so I don't have too much hope for this one. Expect to see some a lot of camera shaking and expect to hear a lot of screams (mainly coming from the screen, not the audience). I'd skip this one.

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Official Website